Relational Lives Podcast

How to Heal from Trauma with Philippa Smethurst

Join hosts Ali and Ros on Relational Lives as we sit down with Philippa Smethurst, author of 20 Ways to Break Free from Trauma, to explore the complex world of trauma and recovery. Inspired by the varied responses to the pandemic, Philippa shares her insights on trauma responses beyond fight or flight, using powerful metaphors like the trauma thermometer and jam jars to explain how overwhelming experiences can shake us up like a Coke bottle. From the isolating nature of trauma to the hope of post-traumatic growth, she offers practical strategies—like breathing exercises and self-compassion—to help release the “fizz” of trauma. With references to her book’s tools, including the “Trauma Kit” and stories like the Japanese kintsugi bowl, Philippa highlights how small steps can lead to resilience and healing. This episode is a must-listen for anyone seeking to understand and navigate trauma with clarity and hope.
 
Timestamps
00:00 – Welcome & Introducing Philippa Smethurst
01:14 – Inspiration Behind 20 Ways to Break Free from Trauma
02:22 – Understanding Trauma Responses: Beyond Fight or Flight
04:00 – The Trauma Thermometer: Too Much and Too Little
06:26 – The Coke Bottle Metaphor: Trauma’s Lasting Fizz
08:36 – How Trauma Distorts Relationships
10:38 – Judging Trauma Responses: A Common Pitfall
13:23 – The Brain Under Trauma: Overwhelm and Disconnection
16:13 – Strategies for Healing: Releasing the Fizz Slowly
22:43 – The Role of Self-Care in Trauma Recovery
27:32 – Philippa’s Breathing Exercise for Calming the Nervous System
36:26 – The Long Haul: Patience and Faith in Healing
40:11 – Post-Traumatic Growth: The Kintsugi Metaphor
44:27 – Practical Tools: The Child’s Slide Breathing Exercise
46:06 – Keeping On: Small Steps for Big Change
47:24 – Compassion and Self-Care: The Heart of Recovery
49:15 – Stories of Resilience: Terry Waite and Post-Traumatic Growth
50:58 – Philippa’s Book and Resources for Healing
51:55 – Closing Thoughts & Takeaways
Follow Philippa Smethurst
YouTube: https://youtube.com/@philippasmethurst
Newsletter: https://philippasmethurst.com/news#contactform
Order 20 Ways to Break Free from Trauma: https://philippasmethurst.com/bookshop (Currently £13.79 on Amazon)
Blogs: https://philippasmethurst.com/news | https://talkingtrauma.substack.com/
For This Episode
Trauma Thermometer: A visual tool to understand trauma responses, from the “red zone” (hyperarousal) to the “blue zone” (hypoarousal). View image: https://drive.google.com/file/d/19MDNHPnfI5Y4k5xIrGGGTGvfOJOmTV7a/view?usp=drive_link
Jam Jars Metaphor: From Appendix 2 of 20 Ways to Break Free from Trauma, illustrating how trauma accumulates and can be processed. View image: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1e5gbchTdzR1wRTI7Psazw0J_v_zaNebD/view?usp=drive_link
Margaret Forster’s Over: Referenced as an illustration of incident trauma. View book cover: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qk9pusrufnj_3vm-SuyKuhoLhDTmfjCj/view?usp=drive_link
Breath Practice (p. 37, Chapter One): “Breathe in for a count of four, out for a count of seven, or use the child’s slide technique: inhale through your nose like climbing small steps, then exhale long through your mouth.”
20 Pathways to Resilience and Recovery After Trauma: A visual guide to the strategies in Philippa’s book. View image: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1bXQbyBkpHenI0zG7wV84FpHRUgmumRYj/view?usp=drive_link
Trauma Kit: “In a medical trauma kit, you may find a stethoscope, needles, a trauma blanket, gloves, scissors… but what might we need in a psychological trauma kit? Because trauma is often hidden inside, we need an even wider array of self-help, and other kinds of help - one size does not fit all. Philippa Smethurst’s new book is your go-to handbook.” View image: https://drive.google.com/file/d/17hSkDG9KHgxtl2fdllXMnnEmi5gtHK_W/view?usp=drive_link
Book Cover: Front cover of 20 Ways to Break Free from Trauma. View image: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1xmN3LI8Lga1LINDUCrrHxFZN-D3ol7JG/view?usp=drive_link
Connect with us
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/relational_lives
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/relationallives/
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@relational_lives
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tempo-psychotherapy-services-33a00318/
Want to share your story or come on the show to discuss your dilemma? Write to us, and we might cover it in a future episode. Drop us a message at relationalives@gmail.com or anonymously complete our form here: https://forms.office.com/e/qcrCkbhPiT. We’d also love to hear updates if you’ve written in before. Subscribe for future episodes on trauma, attachment, and more mental health topics. If you found this episode helpful, please like this video or share it with a friend.
 
DisclaimerPlease remember, this is not meant to be a replacement for personal therapy and is for information and self-reflection only. Please reach out to an appropriate professional in your area if you feel you need individualised help. Credits
Hosts: Alison Bickers and Ros Peckham at www.mytempo.co.uk
Music by: Stile Tree Studio
Produced by: Synergy Podcast Studio

Rose’s Autism Journey: Coming to terms with neurodiversity

Join hosts Ali and Ros on Relational Lives for a heartfelt follow-on from our autism episode, as we welcome Rose, who shares her inspiring journey of being diagnosed with autism at 15. 
From early signs like shying away from eye contact as a baby to navigating meltdowns and masking in secondary school, Rose opens up about the challenges of sensory sensitivities, emotional overwhelm, and finding her place in a neurotypical world. She reflects on the transformative impact of homeschooling, counselling, and embracing her passion for working with children in a nursery. Rose encourages self-compassion and openness, offering hope to anyone exploring their own autism journey. 
This episode is a must-listen for those seeking to understand autism through a personal lens, filled with resilience and practical wisdom.
Timestamps:00:00 – Welcome & Introducing Rose01:19 – Rose’s Autism Journey: Early Signs from Infancy02:56 – Developmental Delays and Misconceptions About Autism05:07 – Secondary School Struggles: Meltdowns and Masking07:11 – A Turning Point: Autism Awareness Day at School09:07 – Navigating the Diagnosis Process: NHS and Private Routes11:28 – The Impact of Autism on Family Dynamics13:38 – Emotional Blockages and the Power of Counselling15:29 – Homeschooling: Finding Freedom in Intensive Interests18:00 – Building Self-Awareness and Confidence22:43 – Sensory Sensitivities: Managing Bright Lights and Noise27:32 – Rose’s Career: Thriving in a Nursery Environment36:26 – The Support of Family: A Mother’s Understanding38:23 – Connecting with a Neurodivergent Cousin40:11 – Living Independently: Controlling Her Own Space42:00 – Workplace Support and Managing Masking43:11 – Strategies for Self-Compassion: Journaling and Cheerleading44:39 – Finding Balance Through Hobbies: Clay and Watercolour Painting45:35 – Advice for Others Exploring Autism47:07 – Rose’s Message: “Don’t Diss Your Ability”48:19 – Closing Thoughts & Takeaways  
For This Episode:  National Autistic Society: Learn more about autism and support services https://www.autism.org.uk/
Connect with us:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/relational_livesFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/relationallives/TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@relational_livesLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tempo-psychotherapy-services-33a00318/  
Want to share your story or come on the show to discuss your dilemma? Write to us, and we might cover it in a future episode. 
Drop us a message at relationalives@gmail.com or anonymously complete our form here: https://forms.office.com/e/qcrCkbhPiT. 
We’d also love to hear updates if you’ve written in before.  
Subscribe for future episodes on trauma, attachment, and more mental health topics. If you found this episode helpful, please like this video or share it with a friend.  
Disclaimer:Please remember, this is not meant to be a replacement for personal therapy and is for information and self-reflection only. 
Please reach out to an appropriate professional in your area if you feel you need individualised help.  
Credits:Hosts: Alison Bickers and Ros Peckham at www.mytempo.co.ukMusic by: Stile Tree StudioProduced by: Synergy Podcast Studio

Autism Uncovered: Dr Graham Campbell on Traits, Myths & The Spectrum

Join us on Relational Lives as we welcome back Dr. Graham Campbell from Flint Healthcare in Sussex to dive into the world of autism in adults. 
Dr. Graham unpacks what autism spectrum disorder is, debunking myths about its presentation and exploring its core traits, from social communication challenges to sensory processing differences. He discusses why autism is often missed in women due to masking, the complexities of diagnosis, and the mental health challenges like anxiety and depression, that can accompany undiagnosed autism. 
With warmth and expertise, Dr. Graham shares practical advice for those wondering if they might be on the spectrum, emphasising the power of self-understanding and acceptance.
This episode is a must-listen for anyone curious about autism, its impact, and how to navigate it with compassion.
Resources Mentioned:
https://embrace-autism.com/raads-r/
https://embrace-autism.com/cat-q/
https://open.spotify.com/show/1f9iLg1OLTqphlx9EQKSZv
https://flinthealthcare.co.uk/
Timestamps:00:00 – Welcome & Introducing Dr. Graham Campbell01:17 – What is Autism Spectrum Disorder?02:39 – The Foundations of Autism: A Neurodevelopmental Perspective04:00 – Gender Differences: Why Autism is Often Missed in Women06:39 – The Rise in Adult Autism Awareness07:55 – The Diagnostic Process: Screening and Assessments10:38 – Sensory Processing: Hypo- and Hyper-Sensitivity12:06 – Stimming and Individual Differences in Autism13:23 – Social Challenges: Navigating Relationships and Communication15:12 – Masking: The Exhaustion of Hiding Autism16:13 – The Self-Critical Voice and Shame in Autism24:56 – Co-occurring Conditions: Anxiety, Depression, and Eating Disorders27:32 – The Value of Diagnosis: Understanding, Not Medicalisation29:56 – Seeking a Diagnosis Without Medical Records33:42 – Autism and Work: Challenges and Strengths36:23 – Advice for Those Exploring Autism: Learn and Reflect38:33 – Would You Rather? Fun Quickfire Round40:56 – Closing Thoughts & Takeaways  
Connect with us:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/relational_livesFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/relationallives/TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@relational_livesLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tempo-psychotherapy-services-33a00318/ 
Want to share your story or come on the show to discuss your dilemma? 
Write to us, and we might cover it in a future episode. Drop us a message at relationalives@gmail.com or anonymously complete our form here: https://forms.office.com/e/qcrCkbhPiT. 
We’d also love to hear updates if you’ve written in before.  
Subscribe for future episodes on trauma, attachment, and more mental health topics. 
If you found this episode helpful, please like this video or share it with a friend.  
Disclaimer:Please remember, this is not meant to be a replacement for personal therapy and is for information and self-reflection only. Please reach out to an appropriate professional in your area if you feel you need individualised help.
Credits:Hosts: Alison Bickers and Ros Peckham at www.mytempo.co.ukMusic by: Stile Tree StudioProduced by: Synergy Podcast Studio

Finding Belonging After Abandonment - With Jason 'Wip' Roberts

Join us on Relational Lives as we sit down with Jason ‘Wip’ Roberts, who shares his heartfelt story of navigating childhood abandonment and finding belonging. From his biological mother leaving at age four to the shock of his stepmother’s departure in his 20s, Jason opens up about the persistent void that shaped his life. He reflects on how the 90s rave scene provided a sense of community, how his travels embraced the familiar feeling of being “lost,” and how meeting his wife, Katie, became his anchor at 30. With humour, wisdom, and a touch of silliness—including a song from his famous shed—Jason discusses overcoming emotional barriers, the courage it takes to talk openly as a man, and building a family that feels complete.
This episode is a moving exploration of resilience, connection, and self-discovery, perfect for anyone seeking to understand their journey through loss and love.
Timestamps:00:00 – Welcome & Introducing Jason ‘Wip’ Roberts01:18 – The Weight of Being a Deep Thinker02:10 – Childhood Loss: Jason’s Mother Leaving at Age 406:04 – A New Family with His Stepmother & the Shock of Her Departure09:35 – Embracing the Feeling of Being “Lost” in His 20s13:15 – Finding Belonging in the 90s Rave Scene18:00 – Meeting Katie: Finding an Anchor at 3022:40 – The Void of Loss & How It Persists28:15 – Jason’s Humour: A Silly Song from the Shed31:27 – A Recent Loss: Finding Closure After His Mother’s Passing33:18 – Therapy & Making Sense of Childhood Wounds36:22 – The Courage to Talk: Breaking the Stigma for Men39:51 – Jason’s Shed: A Creative Haven of Escapism41:28 – Would You Rather? Fun Quickfire Round43:38 – Closing Thoughts & Takeaways  Follow Jason:
Connect with us:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/relational_livesFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/relationallives/TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@relational_livesLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tempo-psychotherapy-services-33a00318/  
Want to share your story or come on the show to discuss your dilemma?
Write to us, and we might cover it in a future episode.
Drop us a message at relationalives@gmail.com or anonymously complete our form here: https://forms.office.com/e/qcrCkbhPiT.
We’d also love to hear updates if you’ve written in before.  
Subscribe for future episodes on trauma, attachment, and more mental health topics. If you found this episode helpful, please like this video or share it with a friend.  
Disclaimer:Please remember, this is not meant to be a replacement for personal therapy and is for information and self-reflection only. Please reach out to an appropriate professional in your area if you feel you need individualised help.  
Credits:
Hosts: Alison Bickers and Ros Peckham at www.mytempo.co.ukMusic by: Stile Tree StudioProduced by: Synergy Podcast Studio  
 

Will Adolphy: From Manosphere to Mentor

Join us on Relational Lives as we sit down with Will Adolphy, a psychotherapist, educator, and speaker who specialises in men’s mental health and masculinity. 
Will shares his powerful story of navigating panic attacks, depression, and the pull of online masculinity influencers during his early 20s. From finding validation in rigid ideologies to discovering healing through therapy, community, and self-reflection, he opens up about the challenges of emotional isolation and the “man box” that shapes how men experience the world.  
This conversation is raw, honest, and full of insights—covering vulnerability, the impact of online culture, and how Will now helps boys and men find healthier ways to connect with themselves and others through his organisation, Empath. Whether you’re curious about men’s mental health or seeking tools to navigate your own relationships, Will’s journey offers a path to understanding and growth.  
Timestamps:00:00 – Welcome & Introducing Will Adolphy02:10 – Will’s Early Struggles with Panic Attacks & Depression07:45 – Discovering a Masculinity Influencer & Online Rabbit Holes12:20 – The Pull of Validation & Rigid Ideologies18:00 – Emotional Isolation & the Block to Opening Up22:40 – Breaking Free: Therapy, 12-Step Recovery & Community28:15 – The “Man Box” & Its Impact on Men and Others33:10 – Working with Boys: Modelling Vulnerability in Schools40:05 – Red Pill Culture & the Search for Answers Online47:30 – Advice for Parents: Supporting Boys with Empathy52:20 – Will’s Ongoing Journey & Building Empath55:30 – Would You Rather? Fun Quickfire Round57:00 – Closing Thoughts & Takeaways  
Follow Will:@psychwill https://www.willadolphy.com/  
Connect with us:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/relational_livesFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/relationallives/TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@relational_livesLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tempo-psychotherapy-services-33a00318/  
Want to share your story or come on the show to discuss your dilemma? Write to us, and we might cover it in a future episode. Drop us a message at relationalives@gmail.com or anonymously complete our form here: https://forms.office.com/e/qcrCkbhPiT. We’d also love to hear updates if you’ve written in before.  Subscribe for future episodes on trauma, attachment, and more mental health topics. 
If you found this episode helpful, please like this video or share it with a friend.  
Disclaimer:Please remember, this is not meant to be a replacement for personal therapy and is for information and self-reflection only. Please reach out to an appropriate professional in your area if you feel you need individualised help.  
Credits:Hosts: Alison Bickers and Ros Peckham at www.mytempo.co.ukMusic by: Stile Tree StudioProduced by: Synergy Podcast Studio

Happily Single: Cas on Freedom, Healing & Living Life Her Way

Shownotes:
Episode: Happily Single: Cas on Freedom, Healing & Living Life Her Way
Cas joins us on Relational Lives to share her inspiring and often funny story of choosing to live happily single. From navigating breast cancer and surgical menopause to finding freedom, independence, and joy, she reflects on relationships, compromise, and why being alone doesn’t mean being lonely.
This conversation is full of laughter, honesty, and wisdom - touching on family, friendship, child-free living, adventure, and the importance of creating a life that feels true to you. Whether you’re single, coupled, or somewhere in between, Cas's story is a reminder to embrace life, live it fully, and define happiness on your own terms.
In this episode:
00:00 – Welcome & Introducing Kaz02:10 – Choosing to Be Single After Breast Cancer07:45 – Discovering Peace & Joy in Independence12:20 – Compromise, Overgiving & Relationship Lessons18:00 – Freedom vs. Loneliness: Breaking Social Expectations22:40 – Life Without Children & Finding Fulfillment as a Godparent28:15 – Adventures, Travel & Loving Independence33:10 – Childhood, Family Influences & Fear of Feeling Trapped40:05 – Healing from Trauma, Grief & PTSD After Cancer47:30 – Advice for Younger Women on Relationships & Choices52:20 – Embracing Adventure, Contentment & Living Fully55:30 – Would You Rather? Fun Quickfire Round57:00 – Closing Thoughts & Takeaways
Follow Cas @danceyertitsoffhttps://www.instagram.com/danceyertitsoff
Connect with us:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/relational_livesFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/relationallives/TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@relational_livesLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tempo-psychotherapy-services-33a00318/
Want to share your story or come on the show to discuss your dilemma? Write to us and we might cover it in a future episode. Drop us a message at relationalives@gmail.com or you can anonymously complete our form here: https://forms.office.com/e/qcrCkbhPiT. We’d also love to hear updates if you’ve written in before. 
Subscribe for future episodes on trauma, attachment and more mental health topics. If you found this episode helpful, please like this video or share it with a friend.
Disclaimer:Please remember, this is not meant to be a replacement for personal therapy and is for information and self-reflection only. Please reach out to an appropriate professional in your area if you feel you need individualised help.  
Credits:Hosts: Alison Bickers and Ros Peckham at www.mytempo.co.ukMusic by: Stile Tree StudioProduced by: Synergy Podcast Studio"

From Trauma to Triumph | Jamie Rudd on Inspiration and Healing

Shownotes:Episode: From Trauma to Triumph | Jamie Rudd on Inspiration and HealingIn this powerful episode of Relational Lives, Jamie Rudd shares his journey of surviving a near-fatal car accident, the trauma and recovery that followed, and how he transformed his experience into SoulKind - a storytelling and community project inspiring hope through adversity.This is a moving conversation about resilience, optimism, vulnerability, and the healing power of stories.In this episode:00:00 - Welcome & Introduction to Jamie Rudd01:10 - The 2018 Car Accident05:40 - Acts of Kindness: The “Superheroes” Who Saved Jamie10:15 - Injuries, Hospital & ICU Experience15:20 - Optimism, Determination & Early Recovery Mindset20:05 - Learning from Other People’s Stories26:30 - Vulnerability, Acceptance & Growth33:00 - Creating SoulKind: From Book to Non-Profit40:10 - Walk the Ways Fundraising Challenge45:20 - Closing Reflections & “Would You Rather”Resources mentioned:SoulKind: https://www.soulkindpeople.co.uk/Walk the Ways: https://www.soulkindpeople.co.uk/walkthewaysAcceptance & Commitment Therapy: https://contextualscience.org/actConnect with us:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/relational_livesFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/relationallives/TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@relational_livesLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tempo-psychotherapy-services-33a00318/Want to share your story or come on the show to discuss your dilemma? Write to us and we might cover it in a future episode. Drop us a message at relationalives@gmail.com or you can anonymously complete our form here: https://forms.office.com/e/qcrCkbhPiT. We’d also love to hear updates if you’ve written in before. Subscribe for future episodes on trauma, attachment and more mental health topics. If you found this episode helpful, please like this video or share it with a friend.Disclaimer:Please remember, this is not meant to be a replacement for personal therapy and is for information and self-reflection only. Please reach out to an appropriate professional in your area if you feel you need individualised help. Credits:Hosts: Alison Bickers and Ros Peckham at www.mytempo.co.ukMusic by: Stile Tree StudioProduced by: Synergy Podcast Studio"

We’re Taking a Short Break | End of Series 1 and What’s Next

We’re wrapping up Series 1 of Relational Lives and taking a short two-week break. Thank you for joining us on this journey so far - it’s been amazing! 🎉Series 2 will be even more exciting, with more guests and real-life stories to inspire and encourage you. If you’d like to share your story, get in touch at relationallives@gmail.comStay subscribed, and we’ll be back very soon on 11th September.Connect with us:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/relational_livesFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/relationallives/TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@relational_livesLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tempo-psychotherapy-services-33a00318/Want to share your story or come on the show to discuss your dilemma? Write to us and we might cover it in a future episode. Drop us a message at relationalives@gmail.com or you can anonymously complete our form here: https://forms.office.com/e/qcrCkbhPiT. We’d also love to hear updates if you’ve written in before. Subscribe for future episodes on trauma, attachment and more mental health topics. If you found this episode helpful, please like this video or share it with a friend.Disclaimer:Please remember, this is not meant to be a replacement for personal therapy and is for information and self-reflection only. Please reach out to an appropriate professional in your area if you feel you need individualised help. Credits:Hosts: Alison Bickers and Ros Peckham at www.mytempo.co.ukMusic by: Stile Tree StudioProduced by: Synergy Podcast Studio

EP 23: OCD: What It Really Is And How Therapy Can Help

In this episode of Relational Lives, Ali and Ros take an honest, practical look at Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD). They unpack what OCD really is and explore how intrusive thoughts, compulsions, and emotional distress interact. Ali explains different subtypes of OCD, how therapy can help, and offers hope to anyone struggling. Whether you’ve lived with OCD for years or are just beginning to question your thoughts and behaviours, this episode is packed with understanding, reassurance, and practical steps forward.Please note that this episode covers harder aspects of OCD including paedophilia OCD and harm OCDShownotes:Episode: OCD: What It Really Is - And How Therapy Can HelpIn this episode:00:00 – Intro02:08 – What Is OCD? Obsessions, compulsions & misunderstandings09:14 – Is It OCD or just a quirk?13:37 – The role of trauma, control & childhood experiences16:20 – Taboo thoughts & shame in OCD23:36 – Types of OCD30:00 – How therapy works: CBT & ERP explained36:17 – Challenges in treatment: Internal rituals, resistance & EMDR42:20 – Client stories & self-help recommendations43:04 – 3 takeaway tips & thought experiments📍 Resources mentioned:'Overcoming Obsessive Compulsive Disorder' by David Veale and Rob WilsonBritish Association for Behavioural & Cognitive Psychotherapies (BABCP):https://www.babcp.comTherapy types mentioned: Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), Exposure & Response Prevention (ERP), EMDRConnect with us:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/relational_livesFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/relationallives/TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@relational_livesYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@Relational_LivesLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tempo-psychotherapy-services-33a00318/Want to share your story or come on the show to discuss your dilemma? Write to us and we might cover it in a future episode. Drop us a message at relationalives@gmail.com or you can anonymously complete our form here: https://forms.office.com/e/qcrCkbhPiT. We’d also love to hear updates if you’ve written in before. Subscribe for future episodes on trauma, attachment and more mental health topics. If you found this episode helpful, please like this video or share it with a friend.Disclaimer:Please remember, this is not meant to be a replacement for personal therapy and is for information and self-reflection only. Please reach out to an appropriate professional in your area if you feel you need individualised help. Credits:Hosts: Alison Bickers and Ros Peckham at www.mytempo.co.ukMusic by: Stile Tree StudioProduced by: Synergy Podcast Studio

EP 22: Toxic Relationships - How to Spot the Signs and Protect Yourself

In this episode of Relational Lives, we take a deep dive into the reality of toxic relationships - how they differ from unhealthy ones, the warning signs to look out for, and why even strong, self-aware people can find themselves trapped in them. We explore behaviours like gaslighting, love bombing, manipulation, coercive control, and isolation, as well as the underlying psychological dynamics that keep people hooked.Whether it’s with a partner, friend, family member, or even in the workplace, understanding toxic dynamics is the first step toward reclaiming your power. If you or someone you know is in a relationship that feels harmful, this conversation could make a difference.Shownotes:Episode: Toxic Relationships: How to Spot the Signs and Protect YourselfIn this episode:
0:00 – Introduction & what makes a relationship toxic1:06 – Recap: healthy vs unhealthy relationships3:12 – The food analogy: unhealthy vs toxic6:28 – Narcissism: traits vs personality disorder9:45 – Gaslighting explained with example15:20 – Why people stay in toxic relationships20:42 – Manipulation, coercive control & love bombing26:18 – How toxic behaviour erodes self-esteem and creates shame30:50 – Isolation tactics & “walking on eggshells”35:12 – Childhood patterns, boundaries & first steps toward change📍 Resources mentioned:Episode on healthy relationships:https://www.podbean.com/eas/pb-3suv8-188c4bdEpisode on unhealthy relationships:https://www.podbean.com/eas/pb-b4zgq-191258eEpisode on the inner critic:https://www.podbean.com/eas/pb-p5jy5-18625d5Connect with us:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/relational_livesFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/relationallives/TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@relational_livesLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tempo-psychotherapy-services-33a00318/Want to share your story or come on the show to discuss your dilemma? Write to us and we might cover it in a future episode. Drop us a message at relationalives@gmail.com or you can anonymously complete our form here: https://forms.office.com/e/qcrCkbhPiT. We’d also love to hear updates if you’ve written in before. Subscribe for future episodes on trauma, attachment and more mental health topics. If you found this episode helpful, please like this video or share it with a friend.Disclaimer:Please remember, this is not meant to be a replacement for personal therapy and is for information and self-reflection only. Please reach out to an appropriate professional in your area if you feel you need individualised help.
Credits:
Hosts: Alison Bickers and Ros Peckham at www.mytempo.co.uk
Music by: Stile Tree StudioProduced by: Synergy Podcast Studio